Dr. Shemena Johnson works with people of color to develop insight and critically think about matters such as race, anxiety, depression, sexuality, imposter syndrome, family dynamics, professional development and empowerment. Her new course,...

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Mental Health
Dr. Shemena Johnson works with people of color to develop insight and critically think about matters such as race, anxiety, depression, sexuality, imposter syndrome, family dynamics, professional development and empowerment. Her new course, Beautifully Black Beautifully Aware is a collection of concepts on various topics, from childhood wounds, identity, relationships and communication; I have used to become conscious in my life. Everyone has a responsibility to work on themselves so they bring a greater sense of consciousness to their life and relationships. It’s about changing your internal state so that you can become BEAUTIFULLY BLACK & BEAUTIFULLY AWARE.

➢Instagram : www.instagram.com/drshemenajohnson
➢Website : www.shemenajohnson.com
➢Linkedin : www.linkedin.com/company/shemena-johnson

Dr. Shemena was born and raised in Los Angeles, California to parents that were blue-collar workers. Her parents were born in the mid-west and were part of the Great Migration of many African Americans coming to the west coast to escape racism and explore better opportunities. Trauma was interwoven into the fabric of my family history. What came out of her family history was not only trauma, but the strength to overcome obstacles and strive for something greater. Dr. Shemena says, “I owe this understanding to my parents of learning how to not just survive, but thrive through adversity. These early experiences have come to inform my therapeutic work. I take heart that life’s circumstances need not overpower you. I have worked with a broad spectrum of individuals and couples from many different cultures, lifestyles and socio-economic backgrounds and I have learned that pain does not discriminate. Many of us at some point have experienced conflict, doubt, uncertainty, loss and sadness that come with life’s struggles.”

To find out more about Dr. Shemena's course, please visit her website, www.shemenajohnson.com

Make sure to follow and subscribe to my YouTube Channel so you don't miss an episode. @nikimarie_radio on all social media platforms. If you would like to be a guest or a guest co-host, please email nikimarieradio@gmail.com

#blackmentalhealth
#blackcommunity
#therapist
Transcript
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You're listening to The Balancing Act with your favorite radio personality,

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Nikki and Luri Luri.

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Hello, Hello, and welcome to the show. I'm your host,

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Nicky Marie. I have an amazing guest joining me today.

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Her name is doctor Shamina Johnson. She has a licensed

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marriage and family therapist that has been in private practice

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in Los Angeles, California for several years. She works with

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individuals and couples on in depth core issues, helping them

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expand their consciousness, heal their wounds, and positively transform their lives.

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On today's show, we're going to be talking about the

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Black community and mental health. Doctor Shamina Johnson works with

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people of color to develop insight and critical think about

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matters such as race, anxiety, depression, sexuality, imposter syndrome, family dynamics,

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professional development, and empowerment. Her new course, Beautifully Black, Beautifully Aware,

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is a collection of concepts on various topics from childhood wounds, identity,

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relationships and communication, and so much more. So stick around

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for the conversation that I had today with doctor Shamina Johnson,

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and again we talked about the Black community and mental health.

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Such an important and powerful topic, So stay tune, Welcome.

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To the show.

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How are you today, I'm fine, Nicki, Marie, thank you

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so much for having me on your show. This is

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one of the topics that I love to talk about,

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which is the black community and mental health. Being the

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black therapist, I've had my own journey, so I'm glad

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to be here.

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Thank you.

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Yeah, it's it's a topic that we've heard a lot

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very recently, you know, with the pandemic. Everyone is now

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coming forward with you know, just talking more about mental

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health and this being awareness month or a lot of us,

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it's been a normal conversation. But then you have a

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lot of others who feel like this is a conversation

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that should not even take place outside of your home.

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You may have heard this before. What happens here stays here,

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or give it to God or pray it away. Especially

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in our community, we're not as open. And why do

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you think that is?

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I mean, there are a lot of factors.

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I grew up under the same you know, Rubert, you know,

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having a family that was a Baptist based in religion,

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and you know, pretty much everything that we would discuss

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stayed in the home, and that I think had a

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lot of consequences to my own mental health, and I

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believe also to the mental health of the black community,

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which is this idea of secrecy and this feeling of

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shame that what you're feeling and what you're processing and

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what you're going through is something to hide hide from

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other people. Obviously that has you know, historical you know connections,

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But what it does is it really puts Black people.

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Under the ground. You know.

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It's like basically on a boat and rudderless, you know,

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because you don't really get the opportunity to develop I

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think the tools to learn how to make I think

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these really strong emotions, you know, such as racism or

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feeling rage or sadness or happiness about the state of

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the world and its impact on you.

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It's like you're taught to really repress it.

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And that leads to you know, anxiety, depression, feelings of

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self hatred. So it does have its consequences, making marry.

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What do you think some of those consequences are, because

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I feel like when we are silent, we have so

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many different things going on, especially like with generational trauma.

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We may have a parent.

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Who hasn't sought the help that they needed, and now

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they're taking their anger, their frustration, their sadness, and they're

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putting it onto their children. So do you mean in

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that way or a different way?

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I'll speak about it, you know, in both ways, making

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your like you mentioned, you know, when you've been silenced,

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like when you think about it on a global level,

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how much of this is not just about being silence

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silence on a macro level, you know when we talk

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about white privilege and you know, being in this being

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in this world, So you're being silenced on that level.

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But then you're also being silenced on an interpersonal level,

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even within the context of the family family.

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So it's a double whamming.

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So you're really adopting you know, a view and a

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belief from a larger world that I think when you

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internalize it of like, I'm being silenced out here and

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now I'm also being silenced in my family.

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Where do you go?

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Right? You know, there's really nowhere to go, And I

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think part of that process is learning how to break free,

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you know, break free from you know, these kind of shackles.

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If I have a mother and I know family like

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families and also parents who are not psychologically sad, they

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have their own generational trauma. But you know, I do

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believe that when you get to an age of let's say,

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eighteen nineteen, you're practically an adult. You have the power

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to actually question these things. You know, you're not like

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underneath your parents' thumb anymore. Right, But I do realize

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how those belief systems perpetuate themselves.

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I mean, if we take it back to history, history

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plays a role in a lot of our lives. But

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if we go back to the history part of black

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people in America, we're talking about dehumanization, oppression, violence, and

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what we're witnessing through the lens of people who are

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going out there and clicking record on these devices. We

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see racism, we see police brutality, we see devisive political rhetoric.

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How do we process all of that? I mean, it's

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it's like we're seeing it. In most cases, we're seeing

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it in real time. I mean, George Floyd, to be

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exactly sure, I felt like I was triggered to be

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angry and too. You know, the rage within me wanted

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to do so much because I'm looking at this video.

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Sure, so as you should, NICKI Murray, like, as you

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should be rageful? Yeah, you I believe, you know, being

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angry and rageful of what has happened, the experience the

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effects of racism and been silence, ignored, shut down, cut off.

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Like it is a feeling that is palpable, you know,

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to be rageful. But the question is is when I

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have that rage, what do I do with it?

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Right?

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You know? Do I you know, this is kind of

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a provocative statement, but do I like go and do

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I just eat all my feelings away.

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You know?

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Or do I really take a different path, which is

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to learn to understand what that means for me? Because rage,

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I think for a black individual, and even as I

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counsel a lot of clients in my office, is something

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that I embrace and I help my clients embrace because

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it's such a real aspect of the black experience of

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feeling the rage and the pain of being silenced, but

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also trying to transform it into something much more powerful

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and empowering. You know, when you can't name this pain

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that you go through, then it goes unchecked.

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Wow.

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You know, So when you are able to name the pain,

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then you can acknowledge thee and then the feelings have.

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A space in order to breathe. You know.

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Talking about George Foyd, I can't breathe, to breathe, and

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then when you can breathe, you can actually regulate your

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emotions a little bit better.

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That makes sense. I actually had a moment of break

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I guess a breakdown or a meltdown, whatever you want

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to call it. But I had something and I called

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a friend of mine who is a strategic self care planner,

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and I said, I'm feeling overwhelmed. Yeah, but I don't

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know how I got to this place, right, Yeah, So

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she kind of walked me through just recognizing what it

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is or what happened and what type of overwhelming do

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I feel? And it was actually over It was a

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good overwhelming feeling because I got so much praise, But

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then I felt sadness at the same time. Can you

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walk me through maybe what without like fully full on

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saying that, you know, when you.

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Talk about the sadness, Nicky Marie, like even the sadness

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that you felt.

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You know, how did you view it?

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Did you view it as something you know, a feeling

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that was you know, did it feel like I was

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weak or did I feel you know, did it feel

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kind of relieving?

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Like what was that experience?

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Like?

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How did you make meaning of that experience? For yourself.

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I felt almost sad because I just felt.

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Maybe I got too much love? Is that?

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Is that possible to feel like you have too much

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of something good?

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Sure?

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Of course, But what did it mean to you to

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have too much something so like so much good?

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Almost like I wasn't deserving of it?

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Yeah?

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Like I didn't feel like I deserved that much love?

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Right? And that just even hearing you.

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Say that that to me, even as a black woman, Like,

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how did we get to this place where we were

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too like we didn't deserve too much love? And so

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this is how you start to walk back and trace

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all the historical antecedents of racism and slavery and feeling

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less than it exudes.

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Like I said, it is almost it's a core issue for.

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Most black people, like I don't deserve and when I

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don't deserve, then I do a lot of things that

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show that I don't deserve. Wow, So it's a really

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like the sadness and the grief is actually a healthy react.

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There's a lot of grief in sadness and knowing one

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I think the beauty of being black in this world,

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but also a lot of sadness and grief of knowing.

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How horrible. Yeah, black people have been treated.

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And I think that is the grieving process that we

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all have to be in touch with too, really mourn

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and grieve like it is sad, but it's not our shame.

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It is the nation shame.

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And that's so hard to separate the difference.

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Yeah, it is, you know, it gets all, it all

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gets intermingled, you know, in our lives. And so going

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back to what you were saying, like, how do you

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start to walk back? It is so complex, you know

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how much that black individuals have to walk back from

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and transcend in their lives, you know, to really uh

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find a sense of health, find a sense of well being,

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to find a sense of peace where your resting state

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is not from a place of anxiety.

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Well, how do we how do we recognize when we

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are having a moment of anxiety or maybe not recognizing

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while we're in it, but before we get to that point.

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Like my husband has moments where he feels very anxious

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and he doesn't know where it's coming from or how

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it happened, but he has severe anxiety. It could be

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just him coming home and getting undressed and then all

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of a sudden he's like, I'm feeling very anxious for

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some reason.

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Again, I mean anxiety. Anxiety actually is kind of ubiquitous

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in the world. It's not I don't really consider it

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a uh, you know, bad thing. I think there's a

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level of anxiety that's quite healthy, but it's pretty ubiquitous.

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But how do you understand it?

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The question becomes, how do you understand your experience of anxiety,

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the nervousness, the stress?

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Is it?

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Because can I ask myself where's this coming from? Is

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it because of something that's objectively happening outside of me?

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Or is it something that's happening within me for psychological reasons?

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I don't know.

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Maybe I am you know, anxious, you know, speaking about

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your husband. Maybe you know I'm anxious coming home because

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I feel all of this pressure, you know, to be

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a certain person to my wife. Or maybe I just

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had a hard day at work, right, you know, it's

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you know, like, where is it coming from? And it

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could be a combination of both. But if I don't

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ask myself this question, how can can I ever learned

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to discover what's happening within me?

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Yeah?

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You know, I am you know, I like to say

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to you know a lot of people, you know what

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is denied and what we don't talk about. I can't

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fix it if I don't know what it is. So we,

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you know, have to question these things. Yeah, and I know,

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you know, just growing up in a family that never

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questioned anything. We didn't question anything. We just took everything

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is true. But it had it really, you know, being

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a therapist, I had to disabuse myself of a lot

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of things that I was told to do. I had

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to really question and say, like, wait, this doesn't make sense.

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You know, I'm feeling sad, I'm feeling depressed. This is

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not normal, and why am I depressed? And that's something

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I can't just pray away.

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But you know, you made up a very good point

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because it's it's almost like when your parents says, don't

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touch the stove, and the child says, why why can't

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I touch the stove, and the parent says, because I

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said so, It's not really you didn't give me a

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real answer on the consequences of touching that stove. You

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just said because I said so. So now I'm curious

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what happens when I touch the stove. So it's kind

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of like when you when you say, ask yourself that

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quite it's so hard. It's so hard to sit and say, well,

255
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why am I feeling this way?

256
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Why do you think what made what made it hard

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for you?

258
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I mean I can speak as well, but you know,

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like what what do you think made it hard for you?

260
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I think it's just the fact of the disconnect sometimes,

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like I almost feel like I don't know myself, so

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then I don't really know how to ask myself why

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am I feeling this way? And it's like my brain

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says because I said so, You're feeling this way because

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I said so, But it's it's not really any defined response.

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So even yesterday I felt like it was almost like

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a moment of gratitude. But then there was also a

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mixture of I felt alone because the kids were gone,

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my husband's gone, everyone is out the house. I don't

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know who to talk to, you know, my mom's not

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answering my calls. You know, just so many different feelings

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and emotions all at once. But then I just started,

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you know, with my podcast, and I felt better.

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Interesting, like you gave voice to the part of you

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that was silence and felt like you couldn't speak.

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You gave voice to it.

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And what you know, I'm very psychoanalytic at my thinking.

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I've done a lot of depth work psychologically. One of

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the things that you know, Freud would say is that

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you know, when we speak and speak and speak and

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talk and talk and give voice, we do come to

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a place of understanding of ourselves. And I do believe that,

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like you know, when you're silenced and you amputate that

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part of yourself, it is a lonely feeling because where

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do I get the space.

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To acknowledge what I'm feeling?

287
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Yea.

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And part of that is can I talk to somebody,

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can I even journal about it, or can I you know,

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even just say it, even to myself, speak the unspeakable

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to myself, so that I can have some space.

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To connect.

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And then you know, when you are speaking to yourself,

294
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there's an eye there and that is a connection to yourself.

295
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Yeah, reconnected.

296
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Yeah, you're connected again. You know.

297
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It's just we have to be conscious of that, you know,

298
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being very conscious and aware of like I am feeling

299
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so disconnected, and how we connect is by being conscious

300
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and speaking the unspeakable. Yeah, no matter how bad it is,

301
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you know, or how great it is.

302
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You know, we a lot of people for some reason

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think that celebrities have it all in terms of they

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have wealth, so they obviously have great mental health. I'm

305
00:19:54.279 --> 00:19:57.440
not sure if you saw this very recently, but Lizzo,

306
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a singer, she was very about feeling on I guess

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alone and felt like she didn't have love.

308
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Yeah.

309
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Yeah, but then she came back on and said something

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about self care and you know, taking that moment, how

311
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do you how can we process when we when we

312
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feel like that, because everyone's self care looks a little different.

313
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Sure, and the higher we climb, not that you know,

314
00:20:30.319 --> 00:20:32.640
we don't all deal with our own mental health, it's

315
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just the higher we climb, Uh, it becomes a little

316
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bit more complicated in how we navigate self care because

317
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there's more eyes on you, there are more there, more

318
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things at stake.

319
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Yeah, so.

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We transcend, you know, that feeling of trying to take

321
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care of ourselves by really starting at a basic level,

322
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which is learning how to question our experience. How do

323
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we understand ourselves? You know, depression anxiety like it may

324
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look different in different people, doesn't mean that we're not

325
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all experiencing it, but the way you tackle it is

326
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all the same. And you know, there's some individuals who

327
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don't have the resources of just you know, being able

328
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to go see a therapist. But that doesn't mean that

329
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you can't process this. You know, there's journaling. You know,

330
00:21:27.559 --> 00:21:29.200
there's a lot of self help books.

331
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They are just like.

332
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Plentiful on the market that can be a pathway to

333
00:21:34.359 --> 00:21:39.960
help you start thinking about yourself in a psychological way.

334
00:21:40.799 --> 00:21:48.920
Yes, I feel like you've been teaching me, and I

335
00:21:50.000 --> 00:21:52.000
go ahead. I know that you have.

336
00:21:53.519 --> 00:21:58.599
Beautifully black and beautifully aware and I was looking at

337
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some of the lessons and I was like, hmm, I'm

338
00:22:01.359 --> 00:22:02.279
actually gonna sign up.

339
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I hope you do.

340
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Understanding the self and childhood wounds. Mm hmm, that's gonna

341
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uh me, I will.

342
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You know, it was a passion project for me.

343
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After you know, so many years of growth on my

344
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personal journey, but also in the room therapy wise, I

345
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see so many individuals. It was one of the one

346
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of the things that I wanted to be able to

347
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give back to, you know, the black community, especially black women,

348
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because I didn't always know how to question myself and

349
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to think about my feelings and a lot of family

350
00:23:00.119 --> 00:23:04.440
issues challenges dysfunction started to get played out in my

351
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relationships and also how I saw myself in my education

352
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but also in my.

353
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Career as a therapist.

354
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You know, it's the idea of you know, I'm starting

355
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being an entrepreneur building my business, and I'm feeling like

356
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my name is doctor Shamina Johnson, and I have Victoria

357
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Williams who's like next to me, and I still feel

358
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lesson and I'm feeling like I can't charge.

359
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As much as she charges. So I started to see

360
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how the ripple effects.

361
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Of childhood wounds with family being black, how that really

362
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infiltrates so many different areas of a black woman's life,

363
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of black people's lives. And you know, it's just I

364
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wanted to feel empowered and build. I wanted individuals to

365
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feel empowered and know that they can build their sins

366
00:24:00.119 --> 00:24:04.440
of self esteem and show the world that they have

367
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not only the abilities and the skill set, but also

368
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have a sense of confidence and how they show up

369
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in the world. And it's you know, not like I'm

370
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this great, amazing artist and I'm just painting a kid's

371
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bedroom every day. Like to be able to show that

372
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I am like this great person and have a sense

373
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of confidence and pull my head high, yeah, you know,

374
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and that is you know, really questioning ourselves, asking ourselves

375
00:24:34.559 --> 00:24:38.279
the important questions, and like dealing with our feelings.

376
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And processing them.

377
00:24:40.720 --> 00:24:42.960
Because if you don't deal with your feelings, they do

378
00:24:43.039 --> 00:24:46.480
deal with you. You know that is you know, they

379
00:24:46.599 --> 00:24:49.039
deal with you anxiety depression, absolutely.

380
00:24:49.920 --> 00:24:54.039
And I just wanted a little bit more information on

381
00:24:54.720 --> 00:25:01.240
why name the course mutifully black, beautifully aware.

382
00:25:02.440 --> 00:25:04.119
It's a great name, isn't it.

383
00:25:04.119 --> 00:25:06.960
It is a wonderful name because I would live. You know,

384
00:25:07.200 --> 00:25:11.880
I'm black and beautiful, okay, and I'm aware. But you know,

385
00:25:12.079 --> 00:25:16.240
for some people, and I think maybe it's because of

386
00:25:16.279 --> 00:25:22.319
how I see things transitioning. There's a moment where there's

387
00:25:22.359 --> 00:25:28.440
so much unity in the black community when things are tough,

388
00:25:30.240 --> 00:25:33.519
but then I see us kind of move away from

389
00:25:33.519 --> 00:25:36.880
each other, like we're gravitating away from each other after

390
00:25:37.519 --> 00:25:42.359
we've gained something. I mean, And this is how I

391
00:25:42.400 --> 00:25:45.200
see it. This is my just my personal opinion and thought.

392
00:25:45.920 --> 00:25:52.319
When when the situation happened with George Floyd or any

393
00:25:52.759 --> 00:25:58.119
Eric Gardner, like so many others where united, Yeah, and

394
00:25:58.160 --> 00:26:01.480
then it seems we divide again to.

395
00:26:04.279 --> 00:26:06.720
The nicking Mary, like you bring up something that's very

396
00:26:06.880 --> 00:26:11.240
important that I think does not get a lot of airtime,

397
00:26:12.519 --> 00:26:15.440
which is learning how to deal with our own feelings

398
00:26:15.480 --> 00:26:20.480
of self hatred and our own internalized racism, you know,

399
00:26:20.640 --> 00:26:22.240
even towards ourselves.

400
00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:26.359
You know, that does not get a lot of airtime.

401
00:26:27.279 --> 00:26:27.480
You know.

402
00:26:27.559 --> 00:26:31.079
I think it's easy, you know, to look at it objectively,

403
00:26:31.119 --> 00:26:34.119
and I think it's also important for racism that's outside

404
00:26:34.160 --> 00:26:38.319
in the world because it's me versus them, so I

405
00:26:38.319 --> 00:26:39.160
could band together.

406
00:26:39.240 --> 00:26:41.599
But how do we look at.

407
00:26:41.480 --> 00:26:46.880
Our own internalized racism and how we navigate that even

408
00:26:46.960 --> 00:26:50.960
between even within our own culture, even within our own

409
00:26:51.039 --> 00:26:54.119
group of like even the way we communicate with each

410
00:26:54.119 --> 00:26:57.640
other of you know, sometimes like you're not black enough,

411
00:26:57.839 --> 00:27:00.559
Like what do I mean, Like you're not you're not

412
00:27:00.680 --> 00:27:02.880
black enough? Like what you're doing is not black enough,

413
00:27:02.880 --> 00:27:05.519
and it's all based on stereotype or that make.

414
00:27:05.440 --> 00:27:07.119
A black card Exactly.

415
00:27:07.559 --> 00:27:09.880
If I say something that you don't agree with, you're

416
00:27:09.880 --> 00:27:11.160
going to take my black card.

417
00:27:11.559 --> 00:27:14.039
Right, So, you know, all of these things that we

418
00:27:14.079 --> 00:27:18.119
say to one another, you know, is this idea of

419
00:27:18.200 --> 00:27:24.759
like all interpersonal like this implied sense of racism of.

420
00:27:24.640 --> 00:27:27.240
Like, look, how we are putting each other.

421
00:27:28.920 --> 00:27:33.200
Underground by how we communicate because we haven't really dealt

422
00:27:33.279 --> 00:27:37.160
with what am Like, what am I really saying to

423
00:27:37.200 --> 00:27:42.160
this person who is like me, you know, who also

424
00:27:42.279 --> 00:27:45.920
has pain, maybe in different ways, but also has struggled

425
00:27:46.759 --> 00:27:49.640
that they're not black enough. Black is you know, it

426
00:27:49.720 --> 00:27:53.119
is not a monolith. There's so many ways of being black,

427
00:27:53.200 --> 00:27:55.359
and I think that is the beauty of being black.

428
00:27:56.200 --> 00:27:58.960
But we have to really check ourselves and think about

429
00:27:59.000 --> 00:28:03.319
like how we are communicated to one another, and that

430
00:28:03.519 --> 00:28:05.839
I think is a deeper issue. Like I said, that

431
00:28:05.920 --> 00:28:09.480
does not get a lot of airtime. I speak about

432
00:28:09.519 --> 00:28:15.000
it openly. You know, even in my work with my clients,

433
00:28:15.039 --> 00:28:17.359
I've even had to deal with my own feelings of

434
00:28:17.720 --> 00:28:22.160
you know, self hatred and internalized racism. But you have

435
00:28:22.240 --> 00:28:26.079
to deal with it so that you can actually be

436
00:28:26.160 --> 00:28:31.000
freer and more open to be with other people.

437
00:28:32.039 --> 00:28:32.519
You have to.

438
00:28:33.160 --> 00:28:38.240
Yeah, well, I appreciate you bringing that up because a

439
00:28:38.279 --> 00:28:40.240
lot of people do not talk about that.

440
00:28:43.559 --> 00:28:47.799
I mean, it's just, you know, perception is reality, and

441
00:28:47.839 --> 00:28:53.400
that's how I perceive things to be very different. Even

442
00:28:53.480 --> 00:28:56.240
if you know, you show a pretty picture of a

443
00:28:56.279 --> 00:29:01.960
beautiful black family, it's it's not always what it seems.

444
00:29:02.640 --> 00:29:06.480
The picture is not always what it seems. But I

445
00:29:06.559 --> 00:29:10.000
find it that you know, even with some of our

446
00:29:10.039 --> 00:29:18.400
black men, traditionally when they're living above poverty level, they

447
00:29:18.440 --> 00:29:23.279
tend to stay away from black women. So I just

448
00:29:23.519 --> 00:29:26.640
I do you think that there's something there as well

449
00:29:27.599 --> 00:29:31.039
with that self hatred or is that just because they

450
00:29:31.039 --> 00:29:36.559
feel like they're in a different earning level or something

451
00:29:36.759 --> 00:29:39.079
that they can't come back and say, hey, you know,

452
00:29:40.319 --> 00:29:41.559
I love my black women.

453
00:29:42.680 --> 00:29:44.000
I think I think it's both.

454
00:29:45.799 --> 00:29:47.920
I think it's both, you know, I I you know,

455
00:29:48.720 --> 00:29:50.920
I'm sure that there are other factors that, you know,

456
00:29:51.039 --> 00:29:55.079
do a fact like that are a part of that.

457
00:29:55.240 --> 00:29:57.359
But I do believe that it's both of what you

458
00:29:57.519 --> 00:30:01.200
just named. You know, it's this idea of once I

459
00:30:01.279 --> 00:30:04.599
have climbed this high rank, you know, high and you know,

460
00:30:04.640 --> 00:30:06.880
I'm making lots of money, you know, I want to

461
00:30:06.880 --> 00:30:11.599
align myself, you know with I want to align myself

462
00:30:11.640 --> 00:30:15.960
with the elite, with you know, with privilege and whiteness.

463
00:30:16.240 --> 00:30:19.640
You know, on some level, that feels like I have

464
00:30:19.680 --> 00:30:25.680
gotten the keys to the kingdom. So I think there's

465
00:30:25.720 --> 00:30:30.079
there's that part, and there might also be some other pieces,

466
00:30:30.119 --> 00:30:34.359
which is, you know, feelings of internalized racism. I think

467
00:30:34.400 --> 00:30:38.079
they're all they all can actually be, you know, part

468
00:30:38.079 --> 00:30:43.279
of the whole equation. You know, when when individuals do

469
00:30:43.440 --> 00:30:45.759
climb very high, you know, it's like I don't want

470
00:30:45.799 --> 00:30:48.279
to be connected, you know, to all of what I've

471
00:30:48.279 --> 00:30:53.640
come from, you know, and some of that could be history, family.

472
00:30:55.000 --> 00:30:57.000
I can't really speak on it, but you know, I

473
00:30:57.000 --> 00:30:57.720
think it's both.

474
00:30:58.359 --> 00:31:02.559
Yeah. Wow, I wasn't expecting that response.

475
00:31:04.480 --> 00:31:05.480
What were you expecting?

476
00:31:06.759 --> 00:31:10.839
No, that's this is a real talk moment. Guys, give

477
00:31:10.880 --> 00:31:12.160
it some chaser.

478
00:31:12.839 --> 00:31:13.079
Yeah.

479
00:31:13.240 --> 00:31:16.000
No, I believe in being real. I mean, it is

480
00:31:16.039 --> 00:31:19.960
a reality that I think that we have to I think,

481
00:31:20.039 --> 00:31:22.920
face and content with as well as you know, black

482
00:31:22.920 --> 00:31:26.759
women in the community who are crushing it, you know,

483
00:31:26.799 --> 00:31:31.640
as far as education and entrepreneurship and building businesses, and

484
00:31:31.680 --> 00:31:35.839
then they're not able to date and meet someone, find

485
00:31:35.920 --> 00:31:38.880
a person and feeling like they have to settle.

486
00:31:39.240 --> 00:31:41.960
So there's all of that that is, you know, a

487
00:31:42.480 --> 00:31:44.519
dynamic that comes into play. M.

488
00:31:45.640 --> 00:31:48.920
Well, you are in Los Angeles, California.

489
00:31:48.839 --> 00:31:50.480
Yes, I am.

490
00:31:50.640 --> 00:31:54.759
And you've been in private in your private practice for

491
00:31:54.839 --> 00:31:59.079
several years M and had the ability to work with

492
00:31:59.279 --> 00:32:03.839
not just visuals but couples. Yes, And a lot of

493
00:32:03.880 --> 00:32:08.920
times we talk about relationships on this on this podcast,

494
00:32:10.680 --> 00:32:16.039
So this coming up show, we actually have myself and

495
00:32:16.160 --> 00:32:20.720
two other relationship therapists or mental health experts. We're going

496
00:32:20.799 --> 00:32:24.960
to be talking about getting back with your ex, getting

497
00:32:25.000 --> 00:32:30.519
back with an X, the Benefit Effect j Lo and

498
00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:31.359
Ben Affleck.

499
00:32:32.960 --> 00:32:33.880
So I wanted to kind.

500
00:32:33.720 --> 00:32:36.920
Of take your get your take on getting back with

501
00:32:37.200 --> 00:32:40.079
an X because it's kind of like a past.

502
00:32:41.599 --> 00:32:43.640
You had to go through the past.

503
00:32:43.839 --> 00:32:48.599
And I don't know how to say, like, when I

504
00:32:48.599 --> 00:32:52.759
think of an ex, I think of my past and

505
00:32:52.799 --> 00:32:56.559
how I had to get over the breakup and move

506
00:32:56.599 --> 00:33:01.200
on and transition possibly into a new relationship. But now

507
00:33:01.200 --> 00:33:08.039
I'm going backwards. Is that hurting myself again? And you know,

508
00:33:08.480 --> 00:33:11.279
the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over

509
00:33:11.319 --> 00:33:14.359
and over again and thinking that there's going to be

510
00:33:14.359 --> 00:33:18.640
a different result to it. So I think of that

511
00:33:18.799 --> 00:33:21.599
when when I think of someone saying, well, you're going

512
00:33:21.680 --> 00:33:23.599
to get back with your ex, I'm like, why would

513
00:33:23.599 --> 00:33:27.759
I go through that again? M Is that like self

514
00:33:27.799 --> 00:33:32.400
inflicted pain? Like I have so many thoughts and questions,

515
00:33:32.440 --> 00:33:34.640
and I know we're almost out of time, but just

516
00:33:34.720 --> 00:33:35.279
I don't.

517
00:33:35.119 --> 00:33:38.720
Know if it's you know, because of time.

518
00:33:39.160 --> 00:33:41.759
I'll just kind of give you like just you know,

519
00:33:41.839 --> 00:33:46.039
how I think about it, what's different?

520
00:33:47.839 --> 00:33:48.839
What's going to be different?

521
00:33:49.599 --> 00:33:49.839
Yeah?

522
00:33:50.480 --> 00:33:53.000
And you have to ask yourself that, like, what's going

523
00:33:53.039 --> 00:33:59.039
to be different? M between from what were the issues then.

524
00:34:00.720 --> 00:34:02.240
And now? Wow?

525
00:34:02.599 --> 00:34:07.480
And if you can't answer that question of what's different, then.

526
00:34:08.960 --> 00:34:15.400
Yeah you have your answer. Wow, Thank you very much.

527
00:34:17.239 --> 00:34:19.320
Because there's a reason, like you said that they're your

528
00:34:19.360 --> 00:34:21.760
ex and so you want to ask yourself what is

529
00:34:21.800 --> 00:34:24.960
going to be different now that I was not? Then?

530
00:34:25.599 --> 00:34:27.719
Yeah? Wow?

531
00:34:28.760 --> 00:34:36.320
Well, so beautifully black, beautifully aware. Please tell everyone how

532
00:34:36.360 --> 00:34:43.719
they can find more information and how they can participate

533
00:34:43.840 --> 00:34:45.760
in this course that you have.

534
00:34:46.719 --> 00:34:51.760
Sure, Well, you can go to my website, uh Shamina

535
00:34:51.840 --> 00:34:58.000
Johnson dot com and you can get access to the

536
00:34:58.079 --> 00:35:03.320
course through there. I think that's the easiest way. And

537
00:35:03.519 --> 00:35:06.599
also I have lots of blog articles that I talk about,

538
00:35:07.119 --> 00:35:12.079
you know, with mental health and you know, just general topics.

539
00:35:12.440 --> 00:35:15.719
And also I have my podcast Dark Matters with doctor Shamina,

540
00:35:15.760 --> 00:35:18.400
where I do talk about other things as kind of

541
00:35:18.400 --> 00:35:20.559
a smart, shorter condensed version.

542
00:35:21.000 --> 00:35:23.000
But nonetheless, I think I pack.

543
00:35:22.800 --> 00:35:24.800
A lot in like maybe ten minutes, you know, I

544
00:35:24.920 --> 00:35:26.840
just give you like a brief tidbits, but I do

545
00:35:26.920 --> 00:35:30.000
pack a lot. But you can check Dark Matters out

546
00:35:30.280 --> 00:35:34.960
with doctor Shamina. I'm on Spotify and Apple but beautifully

547
00:35:34.960 --> 00:35:37.760
Black and beautifully Aware. You can access the accesses through

548
00:35:37.800 --> 00:35:39.960
my website and it's a great course.

549
00:35:41.760 --> 00:35:45.360
There's so many different topics and I know there's videos

550
00:35:45.400 --> 00:35:48.199
and then there's interactive exercises.

551
00:35:50.480 --> 00:35:54.360
There will be there a series of videos of me

552
00:35:54.519 --> 00:35:59.199
talking breaking down these different concepts from childhood wounds to

553
00:35:59.360 --> 00:36:06.760
learning how to communicate love and intimacy. Also, I believe

554
00:36:06.880 --> 00:36:12.280
there's also a topic also on uh, I'm just I'm

555
00:36:12.360 --> 00:36:14.159
drawing a blink now.

556
00:36:14.360 --> 00:36:14.519
But.

557
00:36:16.239 --> 00:36:17.880
Am I crazy or I'm feeling?

558
00:36:17.880 --> 00:36:21.159
Like talking about your feelings? Thank you? Thank you for that?

559
00:36:23.039 --> 00:36:26.239
Am I crazy? Or feeling? That is really focusing.

560
00:36:25.800 --> 00:36:29.679
On learning how to understand your feelings because a lot

561
00:36:29.719 --> 00:36:32.480
of times we don't really know what we're feeling and

562
00:36:32.599 --> 00:36:35.920
we're disconnected, as we talked about, and we've got to

563
00:36:35.960 --> 00:36:40.400
like do that deep dive. So's these are all the topics.

564
00:36:40.400 --> 00:36:42.800
So it's me kind of doing a presentation, doing a

565
00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:45.199
video talking you through it, and then there's like some

566
00:36:45.280 --> 00:36:47.559
guy that exercises that you can take, you know, at

567
00:36:47.599 --> 00:36:50.280
the end of most of the segments, and then at

568
00:36:50.280 --> 00:36:52.840
the end, I do like a really nice recap so

569
00:36:52.920 --> 00:36:54.920
you can kind of like start your journey, you know,

570
00:36:55.199 --> 00:36:58.119
on self discovery.

571
00:36:58.480 --> 00:37:03.079
Oh you're using my line now. I always tell everyone

572
00:37:03.119 --> 00:37:06.239
that I am on this road of self discovery and

573
00:37:06.280 --> 00:37:11.119
recovery and I will be taking your lessons this part.

574
00:37:11.199 --> 00:37:14.119
Am I crazy or I'm feeling some kind of way?

575
00:37:14.840 --> 00:37:17.199
This would help with what I was seeing in the beginning,

576
00:37:17.360 --> 00:37:22.719
Like I almost feel that that moment of disconnect. Yeah,

577
00:37:22.760 --> 00:37:26.800
so to understand these feelings and motions when I'm going

578
00:37:26.840 --> 00:37:31.079
through it and communicating your needs is going to be

579
00:37:32.159 --> 00:37:36.679
so helpful for me and everyone who's listening and watching.

580
00:37:36.800 --> 00:37:38.920
So thank you so much for creating this.

581
00:37:39.679 --> 00:37:40.119
Thank you.

582
00:37:40.800 --> 00:37:43.360
I hope you enjoy and I hope every you know,

583
00:37:44.000 --> 00:37:47.719
the people who you know if you log on take

584
00:37:47.719 --> 00:37:49.360
the course, like I hope you enjoy too.

585
00:37:49.360 --> 00:37:51.480
If you have any questions, you can always.

586
00:37:51.119 --> 00:37:54.360
Reach out to me contact me, you know, by email

587
00:37:54.440 --> 00:37:57.280
or doing my website, and you know I'm very accessible

588
00:37:57.400 --> 00:37:59.320
to answer whatever questions you have.

589
00:38:00.199 --> 00:38:02.800
Awesome, thank you so much.

590
00:38:02.880 --> 00:38:04.880
Thank you. This was great.

591
00:38:06.280 --> 00:38:08.480
This was helpful. I almost felt like I had a

592
00:38:08.480 --> 00:38:09.519
little therapy session.

593
00:38:09.599 --> 00:38:10.119
So thank you.

594
00:38:12.360 --> 00:38:16.400
In our community, it's it's necessary, Okay, it's necessary for growth,

595
00:38:16.920 --> 00:38:20.360
talking through it, breaking the silence. So thank you so much,

596
00:38:20.480 --> 00:38:22.880
doctor Johnson for being here today.

597
00:38:23.199 --> 00:38:25.440
Thank you, thank you for everyone else.

598
00:38:25.719 --> 00:38:28.320
Make sure you follow me on all social media platforms

599
00:38:28.360 --> 00:38:30.480
at Nicki Marie Underscore Radio.

600
00:38:30.719 --> 00:38:32.679
Thank you so much, keep tuning in